Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Bowling for Mules

It's 8 p.m. and my biggest goal of the night is trying to find a free download of Rihanna's new album, Loud. A lot of people don't know how much I love Rihanna but that bitch is fierce.

...moving on...

Today I visited the WIC clinic in Boise. I work "behind the scenes" I guess one would say so I don't get to experience the beloved crying children up close and personal. Today, however, I was shocked at how much of a great time I had. I sat in on three intakes (it's a lot like a doctor's visit, they even do height, weight and take blood) and every single one was filled with kind mothers and calm children. The first child, a 1-year-old named Franklin (side note: people need to start naming their kids this again because it's as cute as hell) loved my attention and when I held him, he wouldn't let go. I tried to give him back to his mother three times but he held onto me. Those are the times when I really love kids. Other times, I'm more just like "eh".

The best part of the day was the WIC staff. You go and try to find me some nicer people on the planet and I guarantee you...you will not. With all the stress, angry/rude clients and screaming babies they face multiple times a day, these people deserve the CNN Heroes award. All of them.

If you are reading this, chances are you know me (or are a fan of the darkly comic poetry of Arthur Rimbaud). And since you know me, the following may not surprise you. So here I am, visiting this clinic with all these lovely people and what do I do? I break something. Not on purpose, of course, but I tend to break or trip on something no matter where I go. (See the number of glasses my mom has had to replace over the years as reference. Apparently, they make comfy cushions.) Here's the best part though. Also, as you probably know, I am germaphobic. So what do I break? A friggin Purell dispenser! As I was walking to another part of the office, I stopped and put my hand under the one on the wall. It responds with its usually stinky foam but alas! it did not stop. Instead, ribbons of alcoholic cleansing goo poured onto the clinic floor, much to the dismay of myself and the people in the office next to me. By the time I grab someone to come see, I find that some poor woman is holding a paper towel under the gush, begging for someone to get her a cup to contain the torrential downpour. Eventually housekeeping (is this a hotel?) is paged. She literally takes the thing apart and bangs it multiple times to get it to stop. Ah yes, a symphony of hells.

So there was my day. Next time, I will just use soap and water.

Bonus feature!

Jamz of the Day:
G4L (Gangsta for Life) by Rihanna (This song tells my life story...well, maybe not)
Santa Fe (Newsies soundtrack) - Christian Bale (yes, he can do more with his voice than just yell at lighting dudes on movie sets)

UPDATE: Rihanna album is, of course, incredible. I have found a new G4L with Man Down (with a Jamaican twist) That girl needs to stop murdering people, she's gonna get caught.

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